Thursday

Hi everyone,

Typing this on my phone before Top Gear.

Today started early: a 7am seminar at work (aborted when the link to the Law Institute lecture theatre failed).  Which wasn't a complete loss, as I've got a chance to write a short piece for the Commercial Transportation Law committee; I was able to pound out most of that before working hours. Yay me.

Day itself was productive: leaping from job to job and zapping them like double-clumsy zombies.  A client who'd gone walkabout showed up (well, rang up) so I can get his matter underway again.  

Left office about 6:30pm.   Cooler air temperature this evening.

Wednesday

Hi everyone,

Frustrating day at work.  Couldn't seem to find my stride, and brain was completely out of step as a result of needing to go to a Rotary meeting (not a member - went as a member's guest) at lunch.  Good lunch but the strain of trying to try and converse.  I am not made for small talk 

Took dog for walk in evening. Very tired.

Clouds

Hi everyone,

Sorry I'm being a pretty crappy blogger at the moment.  In the evenings I seem to be so tired all I can do is pass out.

Not that my posts would have made especially interesting reading: work, running, writing.  If you head over to dailymile page there's the race reports for Run the Maine, the Melbourne Marathon and Sweat vs Steam, which are about the closest I've come of late to writing anything decent about my life.

The last day or two the weather's been trying to persuade itself to rain.  There was actually a shower this evening before I took the dog for his last walk and the air had that 'relieved' feeling.  I remember that feeling, from when I was at Rushworth or Brocklesby.  It's a feeling of memories of happy times, and that the world was wide and there were still endless possibilities still to be explored.  I was trying to remember the last time I felt like that.  I'm not sure when it was.  When I was at university perhaps?  Maybe I'm just having a bit of a let-down after three weekends of running events, but right now I feel like I might have burned up an awful lot of my second chances.

Some night time thoughts

Hi everyone,

Here I am at second oldest sister's house the night before the Melbourne Marathon.  I drove down to the city this morning, went to the MCG to collect my race pack, then back to Brunswick to see a client who's based in the city.  I had lunch of pasta on Lygon Street, and then came out to here.  I had a really delightful and pleasant (and soundly carb heavy!) afternoon and dinner with Jennie and JP, and now I'm typing this on my phone the night before getting some sleep.

I'd be lying if I said I was a font of excitement tonight .  Truth is, I feel a bit blue.  I've been missing Grace and Rachel immensely the last few weeks, because for various reasons I haven't felt I could or should facetime or Skype them.  And Joni's not the easiest person to approach, so asking how they're doing tends to get a frosty response.  But they're growing up and I'm not there to be a father to them, and in light if that, everything else I do - running, publishing, work, whatever - just feels like so much trash.

Added to which, I'm kind of feeling like what I am - mid 30s, introverted, a mix of mediocrity and clown - means I'm having some doubt that I'll meet anyone else, or ever have a family of my own.  I found maybe the one woman on the planet who wanted to be with me and I lost her.  Pace the Internet, there actually aren't plenty more fish in the sea.  Sadly, these are the moments when I look at the fifty or so years of life ahead if me and feel like my task is simply to get on, serve my allotted sentence in this identity, and hope like Hell the Hindus are right about reincarnation, and that I'll get a second chance to get things right.

Well, no more for now.  Will update you in the race tomorrow night.

Early morning

Hi everyone,

It's about 5:20am.  I've been meaning to do a blogpost for ages but ... Well, you know the score.

It's dead silent at the moment.  No cattle losing and no dogs barking. The stars are blurry but visible, so I guess there's some high cloud about.

Things at work are good, if a little slow.  Difficult day yesterday with a combative client and her equally combative son.  The sort of thing where after you've done the conference it leaves you drained for the rest if the day.

Another couple of small publications are in the offing - casenotes in the Agricultural Law News.

Melbourne Marathon coming up on Sunday.  Feeling like I've trained well for it and looking forward to it.

More later.  Feeling tired again.

Tuesday...

Hello everyone,

Typing this on my phone, before I take my shoes off and do those going to bed things.

Productive day, I think.  Woke at about 6am to heavy rain, and woke again to strong winds a little after 7am.  Breakfast and off to work.  The weather had cleared by lunch, and I was a bit annoyed that I'd decided to leave my running gear at home.

The day itself was more productive than it felt like it was.  Having some interesting issues with one if my friends in employment law where she's acting for an employer who also has workers comp issues.  That time in defence work is paying off: if the claim is rejected (which it should be) I think I've set things up for the Panel solicitor!

Went to the op shop across the road at lunch and got the girls a nice looking story book.  Truth be told, I'm feeling their absence a lot at the moment.  Really , perhaps more than ever.  Well, no point griping.  One can complain or one can act.

Left work early (viz before 6pm) as I'd parked in the tower with the bad weather this morning.  Unexciting evening at the Casa with the parentals.  Thinking of joining one of the gyms in town, or the pool, to supplement the running.  A man's got to have a hobby I guess.

More later.