On rebuilding

Hi everyone,

It's about 6:15pm and I'm at the office.  I'm trying to figure out if I have any more work-energy left and I'm pretty sure the answer is no.

I've had better days.  The fallout from the missed deadline of the other week is progressing.  The Client will investigate what went wrong itself.  The partners of my section were meeting this afternoon to discuss the situation.  And the managing partner of the firm (in the head office interstate) will need to be told given there will probably be a financial penalty for the firm.  My own ultimate fate has not been made clear.

You can probably understand why I'm not a bundle of joie de vivre right now.  I'm afraid that this might be a genuine career killer.  I was dead lucky to get this job after the last one; if they ask me to leave, I really don't think my luck will work twice.

Which wouldn't worry me so much - hell, it would probably be a blessing delivered through a baseball bat - if it were just me.  But it isn't.  I still have a wife and children who are affected as well.  Now, that's a responsibility I'll discharge through any means I have to, up to and including giving $10 handjobs behind the Greyhound Hotel.  God knows I've never been afraid to work.  But I hate the thought of Joni thinking "Lord, why is my husband such a screw-up?".

Anyway, I had a good heart to heart with Oldest Sister Economist about it all over lunch through the magic of GoogleTalk which helped put it all in perspective

* * * * *

Sorry - At about that point I completely hit the wall and gave up for the day.  I came back here to the sharehouse, had dinner in my room, watched some TV and wrote a bit (pen and paper - rethinking some ideas, which I find easier to do if I can write rather than type).  I gave exercise a miss tonight.  My legs barely held up through last night's run and so a rest day seemed in order.

Anyway, the more I think about the work situation, the more like career death it seems.  Sadly, my field is a small town in a big city, and by the time the dust settles, I'll be lucky to hold my job, and will be unlikely to find work anywhere in my field in Melbourne.  Realistically, I'd need to think about going somewhere like Shepparton or Albury or Warrnambool.  Which would be great if all this were happening about 9 years ago.  So, it looks like my career reboot in history/heritage/museums/archaeology/old stuff will need to take shape fairly swiftly.  Which, in a way, feels like I might be on the right track after all: Tiffany, over at Figuring out the Plot, told this story about the founding of Notre Dame University -

"Let no one ever again say that we dreamed too small."  ~ Father Jenkins, President, University of Notre Dame
...

Father Jenkins spoke the words above during his induction as President of the University of Notre Dame.  A college that was started by one 30 year old French priest named Father Sorin.  A man who didn't like to be told what to do and a big dream.  He built a one building college for priests in rural Indiana.  And then, it burned to the ground.  On that day, Father Sorin said, "“I came here as a young man and dreamed of building a great university in honor of Our Lady. But I built it too small, and she had to burn it to the ground to make that point. So, tomorrow, as soon as the bricks cool, we will rebuild it, bigger and better than ever.”  And the next day, once the bricks cooled, they did just that. 

So, it looks like it will be time to rebuild.

I can do that. 

More tomorrow.